October 16

You Got a Social Disease

The Cosmos:
{Bree looks over and smiles at Loch}
The Universe:
{Ethan stops abruptly at the end, smiles at Loch} Hi.
The Universe:
{Loch smiles the most fake smile of all time at Ethan} *Hi*. {walks over to Bree, places a hand on the back of her neck and kisses her, looks at Ethan} My girlfriend is not available to help you start your one night stand binge.
The Universe:
{Ethan cracks up}
The Cosmos:
{Bree looks up at Loch} I didn’t mean it like that.. just that music draws the girls in.
The Universe:
{Loch eyes Ethan a second longer, looks at Bree} Not lately. Well, it hasn’t been real good for it so far tonight, anyway.
The Universe:
{Ethan smiles at Bree} And by that, he means it didn’t draw *you* in earlier.
The Universe:
{Loch looks at Ethan} I was talkin’ about when the only people that dropped by were Chloe, Summer, Kendra, Van and Akhiro.


The Cosmos:
{Bree looks at Loch} So play now because the others should be done with their stuff.
The Universe:
{Loch nods to Bree} I think we’re lookin’ at fuckin’ around more than anything with our drummer bein’ down for the count.
The Universe:
{Ethan smiles} So, text Christopher.
The Universe:
{Loch smiles, pulls out his phone, nodding} Yes.
The Cosmos:
{Bree nods and smiles} Yes.
The Universe:
{Loch texts Christopher}
The Cosmos:
{Bree grins} It’ll give him practice in case…
The Universe:
{Loch looks at Bree} So, since *we’re* helping Ethan start womanizing his oh, so cute little ass off.. which I don’t think he’ll be able to pull off, by the way… we should let *him* play tonight.
The Cosmos:
{Bree nods} Totally.
The Universe:
{Ethan arches a brow} What do you mean, I can’t pull it off?
The Cosmos:
{Bree grins} We need a keyboard…
The Universe:
{Loch looks at Ethan, smiles} You’re too nice. And too… caring. And nowhere near selfish enough.
The Universe:
{Ethan laughs} So.. you’re saying *you’re* none of those things.
The Universe:
{Loch smiles again, nods} Exactly. That’s why I’m so good at it. {looks at Bree} And our bassist, too.
The Universe:
{Ethan laughs} Is that something to be proud of?
The Universe:
{Loch looks at Ethan} See… that right there.. that need to even ask that question or that it even crossed your *mind* to ask that proves you’re gonna suck at this.
The Universe:
{Loch smiles} You’re already thinkin’ too much about it.
The Universe:
{Loch takes a seat} I get that you’re a musician, but if you’re gonna pull this off, you’re gonna need a rock star mentality which boils down to “I did it all for the pussy”.
The Universe:
{Loch smiles, lights a cigarette} Not the *music*, which is really what drives all of us, but the pussy which is a nice bonus the rest of you should take advantage of more often.
The Universe:
{Ethan grins} Says the rock star with the girlfriend and puppy.
The Universe:
{Loch smiles around his cigarette as he takes a drag, nods} Yeah, but.. have you *seen* my girlfriend.
The Universe:
{Loch grins} Hell, for that matter, have you seen my puppy.
The Universe:
{Ethan laughs} Yes, I’ve seen your puppy. Now fuck off with that. {smiles} I’m getting one, too.
The Cosmos:
{Bree summons Akhiro and Tristan}
The Cosmos:
{Bree smiles} Yes.. and the Puppy is what will grab even *more* of the women in this place.
The Universe:
{Loch looks at Bree} Totally. {smiles} Now tell me about this song you were singing.
The Cosmos:
{Bree looks down embarrassed} It wasn’t anything.
The Universe:
{Loch watches her for a second} It sounded like something.
The Cosmos:
{Bree shakes her head} Not really.. it was just me fucking around.
The Universe:
{Loch nods} Yeah, well, it sounded pretty good comin’ down the hall.
The Cosmos:
{Bree smiles} Thanks.. That means a lot.. from you.
The Universe:
{Loch smiles} Why? You’re the most talented woman I’ve ever met.
The Cosmos:
{Bree shakes her head} Thanks. Because you’re one of the best song writers I know.
The Universe:
{Loch smiles again} Well, yeah, but.. how many do you actually know?
The Cosmos:
{Bree shrugs} Three.. and beyond that you’re also the most talented musician I know. So.. my fucking around isn’t close to your stuff.
The Universe:
{Loch shakes his head} Let the fans decide that.
The Universe:
{Ethan nods in agreement}
The Cosmos:
{Bree shakes her head} No.. no way. Uh uh.
The Universe:
{Ethan looks at Bree} Uh, yeah. You totally should.
The Cosmos:
{Bree shakes her head} I can’t sing it.. in front of people.
The Universe:
{Loch looks at her} Why not?
The Cosmos:
{Bree looks at Loch} Because.. it’s too.. *hard*. I had a hard enough time singing it for Ethan.
The Universe:
{Loch nods} All right. {looks at Ethan} So, we’ll let Eden do it.
The Cosmos:
{Bree nods} Okay.. {smiles at Loch} I’ll do yours.
The Universe:
{Loch looks at Bree, arches a brow} That was too easy. My what?
The Cosmos:
{Bree smiles} Song.. the one you found in here.
The Universe:
{Loch nods} Okay.
The Universe:
{Ethan smiles, starts playing the rhythm to Bree’s song again}
The Cosmos:
{Bree looks at Loch} It wasn’t too easy.. it was just that I know you won’t let up so it was a compromise.
The Universe:
{Loch smiles} Then that shit totally backfired, because I was expectin’ you to get all territorial about it and decide you were gonna do it because no way was Eden doin’ it.
The Cosmos:
{Bree smiles} I know.
The Universe:
{Loch laughs, kisses her} Eden’s not touchin’ it unless you want her to.
The Cosmos:
{Bree kisses him back} Eden can do it as long as she does it justice.
The Universe:
{Loch nods} All right.
The Universe:
{Tristan walks in and looks at Bree} You called?
The Cosmos:
{Bree nods} Yes I did.. Where’s Saige?
The Universe:
{Tristan smiles} Why?
The Cosmos:
{Bree laughs} We need her screamin’. We’re helping Ethan.
The Universe:
{Tristan laughs} We were kind of.. preoccupied. She’ll be here in a couple of minutes. What are we helping Ethan with?
The Cosmos:
{Bree smiles} His entrance into the realm of serial one nighters.
The Universe:
{Tristan arches a brow, looks at Ethan, Ethan smiles and shrugs}
The Universe:
{Tristan bursts out laughing}
The Cosmos:
{Bree looks at Tristan} He had Loch nervous.
The Universe:
{Loch looks at Tristan} No. *Bree* had Loch nervous. She sent me a text sayin’ he was gonna start a binge of one night stands and she was gonna help him.
The Universe:
{Tristan laughs again} Yeah, okay. {smiles} So, let’s see what happens.
The Cosmos:
{Bree nods} That’s what we’re doing. {Saige walks in and over to Tristan} What’s happening?
The Universe:
{Akhiro walks in behind Saige, texting Kendra that Bree summoned him to the music room, to Bree} First.. why do people think porn is a low priority? Second… I’d appreciate it if you didn’t do that summing shit to me because I have a vampire who requires a little notice if Van and I aren’t going to be available when she’s awake.
The Universe:
{Tristan looks over at them, smiles} Ethan has decided to become a serial one nighter and we’re helping.
The Cosmos:
{Bree smiles} Sorry.. Yes.. that.
The Universe:
{Tristan smiles more broadly} So Bree doesn’t have to.
The Universe:
{Ethan shakes his head} Christ. I’m starting to feel like the ugly cousin or something. {looks at them} I’m actually *afraid* to let *you* guys help *me* get laid. No offense.
The Cosmos:
{Saige grins} Bree was volunteering? Oh that’s perfect.
The Cosmos:
{Bree smiles} You are *not* the ugly cousin.
The Universe:
{Loch looks at Saige} No. That is *not* perfect. Volunteering for *that* is an option she no longer has.
The Cosmos:
{Saige looks at Loch then at Tristan, then back at Loch} Oh.. sorry. it’s hard to keep straight.
The Universe:
{Ethan grins, mutters} I don’t know. It would’ve been perfect for me.
The Universe:
{Tristan smiles at Saige} The king has spoken.
The Universe:
{Loch looks at Ethan} Don’t make me mess up that pretty face.
The Cosmos:
{Bree looks at Saige} Meow.
The Universe:
{Ethan laughs, refrains from commenting about how Bree could make it better}
The Cosmos:
{Saige arches a brow at Bree}
The Universe:
{Loch shakes his head, smiles} Ass. {looks at Saige} What’s hard to keep straight? We hooked up, she fucked Seth, then she clued in and came back home. It doesn’t sound all that complicated from where I’m standin’.
The Cosmos:
{Saige looks at him} She’s back with you?
The Universe:
{Loch looks at Saige pointedly} Didn’t I just say that?
The Universe:
{Christopher walks in} What’s up?
The Universe:
{Loch looks at Christopher} We need a drummer to help Ethan get laid and David’s out of commission.
The Universe:
{Christopher blinks, arches a brow} Wait.. why does Ethan need a drummer to get laid?
The Universe:
{Ethan smiles at Christopher} That’s the million dollar question.
The Cosmos:
{Bree cracks up} Because I’m off limits.
The Universe:
{Loch looks at Bree like “woman”, looks at Christopher, smiles} Pussy gold, brother. Only thing better than one of your mix tapes is a live performance.
The Cosmos:
{Bree blinks and bursts out laughing.
The Universe:
{Christopher nods} Which I totally understand. Still not seeing where *he* needs *help*.
The Universe:
{Ethan smiles at Christopher} You’re my new best friend.
The Cosmos:
{Bree smiles} Live performance to bring the girls running. And since Eden’s tied up with Genja.. he might actually get to *talk* to someone.
The Universe:
{Tristan smiles at Christopher} What she said. He doesn’t need help so much as he needs options.
The Universe:
{Akhiro arches a brow, looks at Bree} I bet she really *is* tied up.
The Universe:
{Ethan looks at Akhiro, arches a brow} No more porn for you.
The Cosmos:
{Bree nods} Me too. {looks at Akhiro} Oh.. you need options too.
The Universe:
{Loch smiles} Fuck the porn. Pass around that calendar.
The Universe:
{Akhiro looks at Bree like she’s high} Oh, I do, do I?
The Cosmos:
{Bree smiles} Dude.. I would imagine listening to your roommates go at it would be….hard.
The Universe:
{Christopher shakes his head, texts Summer “Me and the boys are playing, and we just can’t find a sound”, followed by “apparently the band needs a drummer to help.. open up Ethan’s… options.”}
The Universe:
{Akhiro smiles} You imagine that for me?
The Cosmos:
{Bree shrugs} I don’t know.. I heard how close Van and Kendra were.
The Cosmos:
{Saige shakes her head and walks over}
The Cosmos:
{Summer sends Christopher a text, “Mind if I come keep you company?”}
The Universe:
{Akhiro nods} And they are. I’m not sure if they’re exclusive or anything, but.. they have gotten very close. That doesn’t mean *I’m* having issues with not getting any. {smiles} I’m also pretty sure I don’t need help in that area.
The Cosmos:
{Bree smiles} I didn’t say you did. {grins} In fact I’m *sure* you don’t.
The Universe:
{Christopher smiles, texts back “Please? You know how guys usually have their best friend play Wing Man when they go bar hopping? Well, apparently, when you’re in a band, the *entire* band plays Wingman.”}
The Cosmos:
{Summer sends back smiling and shaking her head, “on my way”}
The Universe:
{Akhiro nods} You’re right. You didn’t say that. You said I *need* options.
The Cosmos:
{Bree smiles{ *Everyone* needs options.
The Universe:
{Christopher listens to Akhiro and Bree, texts} And apparently, Bree wants to open Akhiro’s options up, too. ”
The Universe:
{Akhiro nods} That I can’t argue with.
The Cosmos:
{Summer sends back, “oh this should be *good*, anyone I should bring with me?”}
The Universe:
{Christopher blinks, sends “Wait.. I meant she wants to *help* Akhiro.. Fuck it.”}
The Universe:
{Christopher frowns, thinking about it, texts “I have no idea. I’m still trying to get my head around anyone thinking either of them needs help.”}
The Cosmos:
{Summer heads to the music room, ” I know”}
The Universe:
{Christopher smiles, texts “Better them than me. And apparently, Loch and Bree are together.”}
The Cosmos:
{Summer sends back, ” Jesus.” }
The Cosmos:
{Bree looks over as Summer walks in, smiles}
The Universe:
{Christopher looks over at Summer, smiles} Hey.
The Cosmos:
{Summer smiles} Hey. I don’ t know if I should be offended for them or not.
The Universe:
{Christopher, still smiling} I think they’re actually doing a good job of being offended for themselves.
The Universe:
{Christopher shrugs} Considering when I first walked in they said “We need a drummer to help Ethan get laid”.
The Cosmos:
{Summer nods} All right then. {smiles, whispers} Talk about cutting off their balls.
The Cosmos:
{Summer blinks} Damn.
The Universe:
{Christopher looks at Sumer, blinks} Seriously. I mean *seriously*. {whispers} Well, apparently, Akhiro’s balls aren’t quite so easy to get to because he essentially told Bree he didn’t need help, but thanks for deciding what he needed.
The Universe:
{Christopher smiles} But you just gave me a whole new agenda.
The Cosmos:
{Summer smiles} Wish I’d seen *that*.
The Cosmos:
{Summer grins} Tell me how I can help.
The Universe:
{Christopher smiles, whispers} Gag Bree?
The Cosmos:
{Summer laughs} Babe.. if you only knew. I can’t physially gag her.
The Universe:
{Christopher nods, whispers} Maybe we’ll get lucky and Loch will gag her for us.
The Cosmos:
{Summer smiles} I *can* make it so she can’t speak.
The Universe:
{Christopher smiles} I’ll leave that to your judgment while we’re playing. In the meantime, looks over at Loch} So.. *this* is what we’re going to do…
The Universe:
{the boys look at Christopher}
The Cosmos:
{Bree looks over at Christopher}
The Cosmos:
{Saige goes and grabs a seat}
The Universe:
{Christopher looks at Bree} *Musicians* do not and have *never* needed “help” getting laid or expanding their options in the history of rock stars. True shit. Don’t believe me, look it up. Buddy Holly didn’t need help. Dude from Talking Heads didn’t need help. And they aren’t anywhere *near* as cool, style wise, as Ethan and Akhiro. So.. the first thing we’re doing is *not* treating it like a charity event. Yes?
The Cosmos:
{Bree nods, starts to say something when Summer shoots her a look}
The Universe:
{Christopher nods} Good. {looks at Loch} The only thing that we have to do is play and play *loud*.
The Universe:
{Loch smiles, nods} My theory exactly. And let him front.
The Universe:
{Christopher nods, walks over and grabs the drum sticks} Oh, totally. And with David and Aubrey not here… that can only be helpful.
The Cosmos:
{Bree walks over and takes a seat}
The Universe:
{Tristan smiles} Considering she gave him head while he was drumming last time.. yeah, I’m thinking you’re right.
The Cosmos:
{Saige nods} Oh seriously.
The Universe:
{Christopher looks at Tristan} At… the drums? Please tell me she.. swallowed.
The Universe:
{Tristan smiles} I didn’t go do a sperm count on the drum set or anything, but I’m pretty sure she did.
The Cosmos:
{Summer shakes her head} Nasty. {walks over and sits down}
The Universe:
{Christopher shakes his head} No. We will *not* be letting the drum throne become the next piano bench.
The Universe:
{Ethan laughs} But it’s a sexy drum throne.
The Universe:
{Christopher looks at Ethan, smiles} It’s not that sexy.
The Cosmos:
{Bree shakes her head} They already destroyed the piano bench.
The Universe:
{Christopher nods, walks over and cleans off the drum heads and drum throne just to ease his own mind} Yeah, well.. maybe we need to put them in rehab. I mean, I get the whole rock star bad boy thing, but this isn’t a hotel room, yanno? We *live* here.
The Cosmos:
{Bree looks at Christopher} It’s going to be dealt with.
The Universe:
{Christopher looks at Summer} And this is just another reason I’d never be a rock star. I’m too anal about that kind of thing. I’d be helping the maid clean.
The Universe:
{Loch smiles} Hey, I’ve actually heard of rock stars that were like that.
The Cosmos:
{Summer smiles} Can’t blame you.
The Universe:
{Tristan smiles} Before or *after* they banged the maid all over the room.
The Universe:
{Christopher looks at Ethan} So you know what you want to do?
The Universe:
{Ethan nods} Same thing I always want to do. Have a good time.
The Universe:
{Christopher smiles} I meant playlist.
The Universe:
{Ethan smiles} I know what you meant. Just follow me.
The Universe:
{Christopher nods} I can do that. {takes a seat behind the drums and waits for the others to get their shit together while he warms up}
The Cosmos:
{Summer smiles watching Christopher}
The Universe:
{Tristan looks at Saige, smiles} You going to be my band wife?
The Cosmos:
{Saige nods} Yes I will.
The Universe:
{the other boys get their instruments and warm up and do the sound check, making sure they’re going to be as loud as humanly possible without blowing out the ear drums of the people in the room}
The Cosmos:
{Bree smiles looks at Loch}
The Universe:
{Loch blows Bree a kiss and Ethan starts in with “Sexy and I Know It”}

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Copyright 2017. All rights reserved.

Posted October 16, 2012 by The Universe in category "Fiction", "Vampires